Dream Life

                                            Mountains can't rise without earthquakes and rainbows can't form without rain a match can't ignite 'til you strike it cause its friction produces the flame diamonds are formed under pressure stars shine brighter when they explode and volcanoes can't rise from the ashes until cracks are beginning to show so I know that you feel like you're breaking that the rain never seems to subside that your world has been thoroughly shaken and you're not sure how you will survive but when all that pressure is building and you find yourself struggling to breathe just trust that you're going to get through this cause you are a diamond you see

                                        For Girls Made of Storms and Sadness You are monsoon wrapped in the skin of girl the say you aunt        tells you how you must act in front of boys.        Girls like you must never look them in the eye. Don't forget what happens when boys look in the direction of girls        that carry the sky in their eyes and       the world weighing down on their shoulders. Girls who have seen great sadness very young look vulnerable,   like prey and some men are wolves. They will eat you alive. You are too hungry inside your own sadness, and when you love,      you love like torrential rain-heavy and intense.         you are too soft hearted and hard headed, and she is afraid how many around you can see that as weakness. Some people will want to ...

                                             We are all moved by this weather. by now, all the leaves are gone and we are left with the bare bones of ourselves. the rain is relentless. people step off the bus with jackets pulled tight, heads bowed and feet scrambling for some place dry. i can't help but watch them. we are such a hurried people. never lingering, always in a rush. i'd be lying if i said i didn't feel  like i'm falling behind. i'd be lying id i said i didn't feel the slightest bit jealous. these people- they all have some place to be. when will i know where that place is for me?

                               I think about you as I write. I worry about what I'm saying or not saying. I worry about what you must think of me when you read this, because we both know you still do. Although  maybe not for much longer.  Or may be you always will. I think about how this will eventually stop. This constant urge to tell you everything on my mind. Like how a lot of wonderful things have happened recently. Like how I can't watch Austin power movies anymore. Like every time it rains , and I mean REALLY rains, I think about how we could've made that kiss better. I think about the way you used to look at me. How once upon a time every secret  held a gem, or how I never stopped loving your laugh. NO matter where I hear it. It still made me smile. I know this will stop. It always does. But I'm allowed to miss you. Or rather this idea of you I created . I'm allowed to be angry. I'm all...

                                       I want routine with you. I want waking up in a morning to the sun shining or the rain pouring with you, I want home  with you. I want late night tv and too much to drink with you. I want slow dancing in our living room. in our house, in our home with you. I want you.