Dream Life

  Most of my life has been spent trying to shrink myself. Trying to become smaller. Quieter. Less sensitive. Less opinionated. Less needy. Less me. Because I didn't want to be a burden. I didn't want to be too much or push people away. I wanted  people to like me. I wanted to be cared for and valued. I wanted to be wanted. So for years, I sacrificed myself for the sake of making other people happy. And for years, I suffered. But I'm tired of suffering, and I'm done shrinking. It's not my job to change who I am in order to become someone else's ides of a worthwhile human being. I am worthwhile. Not because other people think I am, but because I exist, and therefore I matter. My thoughts matter. My feelings matter. My voice matters. And with or without anyone's permission or approval, I will continue to be who I am and speak my truth. Even if it makes people angry. Even if it makes them uncomfortable. Even if they choose to leave. I choose honor my feelings. I...

                                      you are not a bad person but there were some things that broke you. and sometimes a broken spirit does things that even they, themselves do not quite understand. like hurt the ones they love the most. like build walls. like pretend that they do not care when inside they are quietly weeping. i know. you have seen the depths of some terrible places. things that took every ounce of peace from your body and sacrificed it at the altar of survival. but you have known soft  breezes too. the ones that whispered their silences into nape of your neck and told you not let go. there is still breath in your lungs and a fire that's burning. hold on to that glow. hold on.